Archive for August, 2005

Blondes and Football

// August 23rd, 2005 // No Comments » // tagged:

A guy took his blonde (substitute with your favorite hair-color) girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!

The Famous ROPMA.NET Terrorism Quiz

// August 5th, 2005 // 3 Comments » // tagged:

"...One hundred percent of the successful terrorist attacks on commercial airlines for 20 years have been committed by Arabs. When there is a 100 percent chance of being hijacked by an Arab Muslim Extremist, it ceases to be a profile. It's called a 'description of the suspect...." -- Ann Coulter The Famous ROPMA.NET Terrorism Quiz! #1 In 1968 who assassinated Robert Kennedy? (a) Abbie Hoffman (b) Tiny Tim (c) Charles Manson (d) Muslim male extremist between the age of 17 and 40 #2 In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred by: (a) Olga Korbett (b) Sitting Bull (c) Arnold Schwarzenegger (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #3 In 1979,the U.S. embassy in Iran was taken over by: (a) Lost Norwegians (b) Elvis (c) A tour bus full of 80-year-old women (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #4 During the 1980's a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by: (a) John Dillinger (b) The King of Sweden (c) The Boy Scouts (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #5 In 1981, Pope John Paul II was shot 4 times in an assasination attempt by: (Updated by ROPMA Reader Michele.) (a) Christopher Columbus (b) Gene Simmons of "KISS" (c) Vlad the Impaler, (d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40. (Name: Mehmet Ali Hagca) #5 In 1983, the U.S. Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by: (a) A Domino's pizza delivery boy (b) Pee Wee Herman (c) Geraldo Rivera making up for a slow news day (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40. #6 In 1985 the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked, and a 70 year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard by: (a) The Smurfs (b) Davy Jones (c) The Little Mermaid (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40. #7 In 1985 TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a U.S. Navy diver was murdered by: (a) Captain Kidd (b) Charles Lindbergh (c) Mother Teresa (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #8 In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by: (a) Scooby Doo (b) The Tooth Fairy (c) Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid with dynamite left over from the train job. (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 ** Update - Libya Accepted Responsibility. Libya is a Muslim country. ** #9 In 1993 the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by: (a) Richard Simmons (b) Grandma Moses (c) Michael Jordan (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #10 In 1996 19 Americans were killed and hundreds more woulded at the U.S. Military complex at Khobar Towers, Saudi Arabia because of attacks by: (Update by ROPMA Reader Steven K.) (a) The Verizon Guy (Can you hear me now?) (b) Domino's Pizza "noid" (c)Clinton Administration Secretary of State Madeline Albright (d)Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #11 In 1998, the U.S. embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by: (a) Mr. Rogers (b) Hillary, to distract attention from Wild Bill's women problems (c) The World Wrestling Federation to promote its next villain: "Mustapha the Merciless" (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #12 In 2000, The USS Cole was attacked and more than 15 American Sailors were killed by: (a) David Letterman (b) Shaquille O'Neil (c) The Cookie Monster (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #13 On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked and destroyed and thousands of people were killed by: (a) Bugs Bunny, Wile Coyote, Daffy Duck, and Elmer Fudd (b) The Supreme Court of Florida (c) Mr. Bean (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #14 In 2002 the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against: (a) Enron (b) The Lutheran Church (c) The NFL (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #15 In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by: (a) Bonny and Clyde (b) Captain Kangaroo (c) Billy Graham (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #16 In 2001 Phillipene Missionaries Gracia and Martin Burnham were kidnapped, held for over a year, and Martin subsequently killed by: (a) Mr. Rogers (b) Scooby Doo and Shaggy (c) Ronald Reagan (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #17 On July 4th 2002, 2 Innocent Airline Passengers Were Killed, And 3 Others Injured at the ticket counter of El Al Airlines in the LAX International terminal by: (a) Hulk Hogan after losing the WWF Title (b) The cast of Monty Python (c) Senator Lil' Tommy Daschle (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 41 #18 On July 31st 2002 5 Americans were killed by a Palestinian HAMAS bomber in Jerusalem while attending school by: (a) The US Congress (b) The Tooth Fairy (c) The Easter Bunny (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40 #19 On October 12th 2002 more than 200 innocent civilians (including 200 Australians and 5 Americans) were brutally murdered by: (a) Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy (b) Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street (c) Charles Barkley (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 41 #20 On October 29th 2002 more than 700 Moscow theatre goers were taken hostage and threatened with execution by: (a) Royal Canadian Mounted Police (b) Laurie Dhue of Fox News Channel (c) Phil Donahue, of MSNBC, pissed because Fox News is kicking hihttp://www.ROPMA.NET s ass (d) Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 41 "Nope... I really don't see a pattern here to justify profiling, do you? So, to ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer be allowed to profile certain people. They must conduct random searches of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper identification, secret agents who are members of the President's security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of Honor winner and former Governor Joe Foss, but leave Muslim Males between the ages 17 and 40 alone because of profiling. " available at ROPMA.NET

The gay dog in our neighborhood

// August 5th, 2005 // 2 Comments » // tagged:

Monday when we got home from work -- there was a black spaniel hanging out at the gate -- trying to get into the backyard with MacGyver. Steve and I went over to check it out and the dog was obviously well-taken care of, not a stray. His tag said his name was Ripley and gave a phone number - so we called. His owners weren't at home -- so we told them where Ripley was. By the time we went back outside -- Ripley had squeezed between the gate into the yard. He and MacGyver did the whole sniff each other thing - and then started running around a little bit. Steve went inside to get some treats for both of them -- and that's when I looked over and Ripley was licking MacGyver. And not on his face. :shocked: Then ... he starts humping up against his leg. Mac thinks he's playing -- and swats him away. Mac starts with his playing -- where he puts his front paws flat down on the ground -- and leans down with his head - and then jumps at Ripley. Then Ripley starts trying to hump his leg again. I was like -- STEVE! COME OUT HERE AND STOP THIS DOG FROM MOLESTING MACGYVER!!! Mac has finally figured out that Ripley "plays for the other time" and is not, in fact, interested in playing. He runs up to me and looks up at me like "what is going on here???" Steve comes out - and just starts laughing because Ripley keeps trying to get-it-on with Mac. And he's having none of it -- just keeps swatting him off. We don't want to have to keep the horn-dog off Mac all night -- so I go inside and do a reverse lookup on the phone number. Ripley's house is about 2 miles down the road (I wonder how many other dogs he's been with ... :wink: ). We pop him in the car and drive him back to his house. Mac was visibly relieved to have the yard back to himself ... but also to be free from Ripley's unwanted advances. But I'm still trying to figure out exactly what's going on. :uhh: I mean -- MacGyver is definitely a cutie -- but that's no excuse!!

Teeny Weenies

// August 4th, 2005 // 2 Comments » // tagged: > >

For a size referenceLook what's living at my house for the next few weeks. We got two dachshund puppies for my grandmother's birthday (my grandparents have always had dachshunds and their dog, Brownie, died about 10 months ago; I know they miss having him around. These two will definitely give them some smiles!!!!) They're six weeks old - and they weigh TWO POUNDS each. I took a picture with a DVD for a size reference ;) I've never taken care of puppies before ... and I must say I"m pooped and we've only had them for two days now. They've woken me up 3-4 times every night ... and they're mischevious little buggers too! I think they plot to go in different directions to see how far one of them can get by the time I've caught the other one. And the pee! And poop! Oh my! I posted several pictures of the puppies ... and an OK of them with MacGyver (who weighs more than 26 times what they weigh). He's very curious about them ... and doesn't relax when they're outside with him. It's too funny. I'm just relieved he knows they're dogs (and not rabbits -- but that's another story for another time .... ) More Pictures Here!

Pretty in Pink Powerbook

// August 4th, 2005 // 2 Comments » // tagged: >

Pretty in Pink PowerbookI got a tattoo for my powerbook -- and I love it! It comes with the apple cut out ... so it still glows :) It's definitely Pretty in Pink! Get one for your apple (they do ipod, mac mini tatoos too!) at We Love Macs. Schtickers has nifty ones for other laptop brands too!