Hannibal-icious

:soapbox: A friend of mine left a tearful voicemail for me this morning telling she'd broken up with her boyfriend of a year ... poor girl. This guy has put her through the ringer -- he's one of those "emotionally unavailable" guys. You probably know one. (And yes, I am sure there are girls out there like this too -- it's not just a guy thing!) The guys who you're never quite about -- you know you're friends, you do go out on dates together, maybe even exclusively, you have a good time together, and you'll even kiss frequently -- but there isn't a passion between you, and there's no emotional intimacy whatsoever. There aren't any late night talks about whats important to you. You can't really let it all out around them. Some of your friends might not even know you're dating, because his behavior in public is so awkward. Because they don't want anyone to get close to them. (I speak from experience here obviously ... I dated another Emotionally Unavailable Guy for a year and a half before meeting my sweet husband ;) ). Anyway - you know the story. :banghead: You think you can change them. You're the girl who will turn it all around and make them realize they need other people in their lives. Well ... as my friend has learned ... this guy doesn't want to change. He likes the relationship just as it was -- convenient. He had someone to do things with on the weekends and a date to various functions. He even got some really great gifts out of it between birthdays and christmas -- but commitment? Dare I say -- Marriage? Uh .... no. :censor: That never entered his tiny brain. Even when asked point blank several months ago if he ever thought about getting married, does he suck it up, admit he hasn't and let my friend move on and find a guy who's in it for the long haul -- no -- he says he has a problem with commitment but he's working on it. Um hmm. Well while some younger guys might have a chance at growing up -- you're 40 years old -- if you haven't figured it out by now, I don't think you're gonna.

ARGH. Venting here. Sorry. It's so frustrating to see my friend hurting so much -- she won't even talk about what happened to finally make her see the light of day and break it off. He probably spouted off another bunch of 'I can't commit' mumbo jumbo. Who knows. Every girl this guy has dated has ended up breaking up with him and then marrying almost the very next guy she dates. So ladies -- if you want to get married -- date this guy and then you're all set. That's what I want to tell my friend .... but I doubt she'd see the humor in it this early after the breakup.

Oh well. Thank goodness I have a sweetie of a husband :heartbeat: who is smart, funny, listens to me, and cares about my feelings. Times like this remind me just how lucky I am. :hug: